Etraya: Inbox

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

TEXT • VOICE • VIDEO • ACTION
USERNAME: HANK

Hank here. I probably don’t give a rat’s ass what you have to say. Leave me alone. How the hell do I get this damn thing to stop rec — [BEEP]

Comments

[instabilitatem]

Your socks. [Connor looks down at his sneakered feet.] I don't wear socks.

I can return them if you want.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

My socks.

[Hank has to blink at that.]

They were at least clean, right?

[instabilitatem]

I assume so. [Maybe? Maybe not? Connor is not a domestic model, he's still learning this stuff.]

text on the way back to the apartment

[instabilitatem]

Alrys is gone.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

[Hank’s following Aurora’s announcement and all, but still he’s gotta ask:]

GONE gone, right? Like dead? Really dead?

[instabilitatem]

[Connor is climbing the steps of the apartment building two at a time.]

Gone gone.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Jesus, Connor.

Feels weird to say, but thank fucking god.

[Hank is getting up off the couch. Pacing around the apartment before he texts:]

Where are you? Are you safe?

[instabilitatem]

[Connor is at the apartment door when Hank texts him back and Connor fits the key into the lock before pushing the door open. Seeing Hank there, remember how he held a pistol to Hank's head after stealing it from Max-- it's too much on top of everything else. His emotions are running wild after the news and he surges into the apartment to curl his arms around Hank in a tight hug.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Hey. Hey.

[Connor beats him to the punch, and all Hank has to do now is return the hug. For a moment, though, he hesitates. Remembering how when Connor first got here, it hurt: touch. Hank hurt him.

But Connor’s okay. He’s real and alive and he’s here.]

I’ve got you, yeah? [Hank pats his head, holding Connor against him.] I’ve got you.

[instabilitatem]

[Connor couldn't cry or, rather, he didn't know how to. He'd seen others do it in his time as a detective, but he'd never seen another android cry, not even Carlos Ortiz's poor android. Not even after being beaten and attempting destruction did it cry. Perhaps they did not have the proper machinery to release tears, perhaps crying was an error in their programming.

So Connor doesn't cry, but there is an ache deep inside him that has no name.

He buries his face in Hank's shoulder, breathing in shelter and safety and everything he never truly felt until this news. Never again would Alrys put her fingers into his mind and twist and pull until she wired him exactly as she wanted.

He was safe.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

I’ve —

[Does Hank need to say it again? Does it help at all?

It feels nice to hold Connor like this. Warm. Homey. Not that Hank wants Connor to feel this distressed on the regular, but it feels right. That it’s Hank he’s coming home to; Hank he wraps his arms around.

The person who hurt Connor is finally gone. Hank wishes he could’ve been there to see it, but deep down he knows it’s for the best he had to stay behind. How could he have kept his cool while facing down the person who hurt Connor so badly?]

You just let me know what you need, Connor. Whether that’s words or space or a goddamn hug, or — whatever you need. I’m here.

[instabilitatem]

[Connor has no idea what he needs, outside of continuing to hold Hank. Of course, Hank doesn't need to do anything either, but even if Connor knew, he has no words for perhaps the first time in his short life.]

I don't know.

[He murmurs it into Hank's shoulder as his hug does not decrease in tightness in the slightest. Perhaps simply knowing that Alrys is gone would be enough.

Or maybe it's holding Hank here and now, knowing she can never use Connor to hurt Hank again.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

That’s okay.

[He smiles against the side of Connor’s head. Both happy and a little sad.

Hank wishes Connor didn’t have to feel this scared, but he can’t take that away. Hank just needs to be here. Treat Connor well. Stop putting his foot in his mouth and fucking everything up. Seek that goddamn smile, always.]

Don’t gotta say anything. [Raising his palm to Connor’s back; rubbing up and down, softly.]

[instabilitatem]

[Connor wasn't sure how one might improve a hug, but there Hank goes. Hank rubs his hand down Connor's back and something in his systems registers the comfort. Something else quiets and Connor actually powers down. Just a quiet little nap there in Hank's arms.

Just a casual hundred plus pounds of android going completely boneless in Hank's arms.]

ooc adorable af, ic big frighten

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

[Hank is enjoying the hug. He wonders, idly, if that might be a little wrong of him — when Connor goes boneless in his arms.]

Connor? [He sags a bit beneath his weight, knees dipping. Startled.] Connor?

[Trying to raise him up enough to look at his face and he’s just out. Of course Hank is going to freak out. What the hell is he supposed to do here? Is there some kind of reset button?

Hank is muttering “fuck” over and over as he eases Connor onto the couch. Sitting beside him now, hand cupping his face.

Sumo, too, comes to nose at Connor’s legs.]

the duality of their relationship

[instabilitatem]

[Connor is out cold, his breathing steady as Hank eases him onto the couch. His head drops to the side and he snoozes for about five minutes before he rouses, blinking sleepily up at Hank.]

Hank, what's wrong?

[Nevermind that the last thing he remembers is being upright.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Jesus fucking Christ. I thought you were...

[Hank brushes Connor’s cheek with his thumb before pulling his hand away.]

Just scared me, Connor. You were out like a light for a while there.

[And this guy has the gall to look all sleepy like that. Innocent, somehow. Trusting, maybe: for Hank to keep him safe.

Hank clears his throat and gives Sumo’s head a pat.]

[instabilitatem]

Oh.

[That's it. Connor is trying to figure out why he would power down like that, but maybe it's a new 'feature' of being a deviant.

Give him a moment as he wipes at his eyes unnecessarily. Then it clicks.]

It may have happened because I felt safe. I haven't been sleeping since the I wasn't selected for the Solmara mission.

[Not that he needs sleep specifically, but he needs to rest and rejuvenate every now and then to keep circuits from crossing.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Did you... want to go?

[Gaze flitting back to Connor’s:] I didn’t want you to. Especially not without me. If they would’ve sent you without me... it wouldn’t have been pretty.

[Not that Hank cares much about what other people think of him, not when it comes to keeping Connor safe. But he would’ve escaped that goddamn camp, or at least tried. Hollering and screaming.]

[instabilitatem]

[Connor considers for a moment before nodding.]

I wanted to make sure no one else got hurt.

[And if that meant he got destroyed again, then fine. Well, perhaps not fine, not for Hank.]

I wanted to hurt Alrys. [He remembers all the android murders they investigated and frowns at himself.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

I wanted to hurt that fucker, too. Although you — you deserved that chance. More than me.

But I didn’t want you to risk yourself. So while I get it — [Hank’s shoulders slump as he sighs] — I dunno. Is it fucked up to say I’m glad that you didn’t go?

Alrys is gone. Suppose that’s what matters. And I hope you can... y’know. Rest easier.

[instabilitatem]

[Connor tries to find the words to express how he's feeling. He takes time to sit up in the mean time.]

I wanted to hurt her myself. I wanted to make sure she could never reprogram me again.

[His mind flashes to that moment again: his fingers curled around the trigger of a pistol, looking down the barrel at Hank.

Never again.]

I wanted to make her suffer.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

I know, Connor.

[Hank’s voice is calm, although he is... concerned. But he’ll always worry about Connor, won’t he? Alrys or no.]

I wanted to hurt her, too. For what she did to you. For what she made you do. I — just. Fuck. [Clenching his fists in his lap.] Listen to me, Connor. Listen.

[Raising both hands to set one on each of Connor’s shoulders now.]

[instabilitatem]

[Connor is concerned, too. He's never felt any of these cornucopia of feelings, most of which are positive, but the insidious darkness sneaking in makes him a bit sick to his stomach. What if he felt this way about others in Etraya?

He blinks at Hank and nods. He's listening.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

I don’t want you to end up like me.

[He squeezes Connor’s shoulders.]

And I know. I get it. I do. I hate that you got hurt. I hate it. Wanted to hurt Alrys for you, too. For me. For us.

But I don’t want you to focus on the hate in you, Connor. I want you to focus on Sumo and me. Your home, your friends. Those paintings you do, yeah? Your nice new clothes.

Not saying to let go of all that hate in you, ‘cause I know it’s hard if not downright fucking impossible, but I just — I want better for you, Connor.